Your biggest enemy was never the wolf…. It’s always been the fear of moving forward… Livonne
I’ve always been a worrier. If someone was late home, I imagined they were injured or in trouble and couldn’t contact me to let me know. If a letter came in, I wouldn’t open it for fear it might be something bad. If someone asked me to join in something, I would find an excuse for fear I might fail at it.
Well no more! I have lived through all those things and I’m still standing. Sometimes those I love were late because they stopped to buy flowers. Sometimes, they never came home and my heart broke. I’ve opened those letters… some were good, some were bad. I’ve joined in.. Occasionally I’ve been laughed at but usually I’ve just had fun.
Our fear holds us back much more than the events that happen. I’ve started to change my inner dialogue. This is something I’ve been working on for years but lately I’ve really started to jump on the taunts I give myself and rephrase everything. Yes something bad might happen, but what if it DOESN’T? Do I waste the rest of my life preparing for the worst? NO! I can’t keep living with fear.
This week, I faced my fear of not being good enough and entered a large art competition with one of my pieces of work. As I hit that send button, I was completely terrified. Then once it was done, I realised that nothing happend. Nothing in my world had changed. I’d sent an image to an art show. Nothing more. My mum always used to say “The worst thing they can do is say no”. She was right. The worst thing that can happen is that it doesn’t win a prize. Probably 95% of the other entrants won’t win a prize either. But I can never be in the top 5% if I never put it out there in the first place.
No more fear here… Well at least no more letting the fear win. My enemy isn’t an external thing. It’s all internal and it’s time to let it go. It’s time to start moving forward. It’s the only way to live.